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NetherlandsBernd2021-03-08 21:41:47 · 5yNo. 111645reply
Day report time :)
 
>didn't get called by municipality welfare office
>promised my little eight year old brother to buy him a book of his choosing because I forced him to a park where there were dogs, which scare him
>he gets twelve euros budget
>go at three in midday, get allotted about thirty minutes
>the cheeky fucker is looking only at the most expensive things because he thinks he has a lot of time on hand
>I tell him if he doesn't choose by five past half four, he'll get nothing
>he freaks out and starts to pace around
>looks at minecraft, fortnite, youtube let's play vlogger and informatics books
>it's all stupid shit and too expensive and I criticise him
>try to get him to pick chess and math books
>he paces more panicked as time goes on
>eventually gets me to beg our mum for five euros extra
>she's cheap, but relents
>I have to convince him not to buy shitty books made to cashgrab or fucking fifty page informatics books that have less content than a wikipedia page
>he eventually grabs a book about some ice princess by the same guy/girl of Geronimo Stilton
>he's still visibly not happy but we're out of time
>'OK, i'll allow you to change your book once'
>he still struggles to choose and still looks at twenty six euro fantasia geronimo stiltons, begging me to allow him to keep the money for savings to buy fantasia's or to give him one more euro
>I rage because I haggled mom for one euro
>almost punch him, bookstore worker looks at me
>eventually I get him to let me pick a book for him
>it's a chess training book disguised as a novel
 
>le evil plan hatched
 
later
 
>video call with Primark, clothing retailer for job, I talk like normal, woman says I have to use normal language that describes what I think instead of showing off with difficult words and showing off that I can pronounce them
>mfw the most difficult word I used was empathetically
still later
>go to watch twin bro's taekwando training
>red dye hot sex moroccan twenty-ish girl is being a latent dominatrix
>me_likey.png
>she keeps glancing at me
>:))
 
Later I got angry at my mother because they put my smarter brother on soccer while he's bad at it and gets bullied instead of chess. I then figured out that chess can be fit into the schedule but she wouldn't hear any of it.
 
It makes me angry. At eight years old, he's late to training to become a potential grandmaster. Semitic people are very easily satisfied with mediocrity, it's so fucking pathetic. I got really pissed and kept pressing on the same issue, he also got a little upset that my mother blocks this development of his. That while she expects him to become a soccer-playing doctor. What a fucking retard.
 
She thinks that after elementary school and some taekwando he'll be exhausted, while if anything he'll be energised. A bite to eat and a drink to drink and he'll be able to calm down with a game of chess, after a day of mostly social and physical and little intellectual labour.
 
Anyways, his once chance at life probably won't have him become a Grandmaster. My mom thinks that unrated me can teach my little brother chess adequately, kek.
 
So, Berndie, how was your day?
If I can blog, so can you. It's not like this imageboard is used for much else.
 
Also::: KC chess tournament when?
11 messages omitted.
NetherlandsBernd2021-03-09 22:24:10 · 5yNo. 111711reply
Update:
 
My mother and brothers bought a new 'book', a fifty page Lego playset that LARPed as a history book with factoids. My little brother already had plenty of Lego's beforehand.
 
I got angry, talked pissed at them, told my little brother he's never ever going to make it in chess and that even if he wanted to, he couldn't because he's dumb. He put his paws on my new chessboard so I hit him on the arm.
 
Pretty annoying kid that he tells me he's relatively happy with the gift and then tells my mother to return it, and that my mother tells me she's probably not returning it only to return it. She has fourtyfour thousand euros in her bank account and I have only loans and debts.
 
I campaigned in the city with flyers with two other youths and when I came back my mother wasn't very happy. We got in a fight and she talked angrily at me, so I made threats and death threats. I told her that it was smart of her if she didn't touch me because I would probably hit her really hard.
 
I left, blocked her on all communication platforms and then came back to grab my stuff and leave.
 
I feel a bit ashamed at this, but I also think that they shouldn't have disrespected me by returning my gift and buying a fucking LEGO playset, calling it fucking educational, and buying yet another 'history' factoid book when we already had plenty of history books and LEGO sets.
 
Stupid cheap, greedy bitch wouldn't return my money because I had bought my little brother a book, completely forgetting it was on MY TERMS.
 
Their mediocrity ticks me off. I am ashamed at what I said and did but I will not make amends or apologies because for their sake and mine, it's better if maybe I go six months or a year avoiding them. Then I can decide how I should approach them again if at all, and to what extent I want to be part of their family.
 
I wonder if I should kill myself for being such a piece of shit, mediocre faggot. I could get some narcotics, since suicide by hard drugs is said to be painless. I could buy sleeping pills and ingest them all and all of my suffering would immediately end. I really want to die, this life has little purpose and God is a joke.
 
TLDR; I fucked up and shit hit the fan because my family disrespected me and my autism powered up.
NetherlandsBernd2021-03-09 22:36:53 · 5yNo. 111712reply
Oh yeah, fucking hilarious.
When I came back to get my shit, she had lost her anger.
She noticed I had blocked her even though I told her I wouldn't, but I told her never to contact me again after she told me maybe visits weren't necessary, especially not when my brothers were home.
 
So she lost her anger, tried to argue for controlled visits when my brothers were absent. I know what kind of death trap this is.
 
I told her that this is bullshit and that she would remain blocked and that I was going to fuck off and maybe I would see her when I was old.
 
My younger brother who wasn't the spoiled shit was asking me to talk it out, but I ignored him.
 
I then left, and on my way out grabbed three cookies from an entire box of cookies. She looked at me in an insanely pitiful manner and told me to take the entire box of cookies. I told them to have a nice life and fucked off.
 
I wonder if this is alright. I think that if I do not visit them or contact them for one or three months, I will be able to not visit them for ten or more years. I think it's alright if I permanently stopped contacting them. It would make suicide easier.
 
Her idea was that I would go away, as I was angry, and after having made up my mind come like a silly, impudent child to visit them and play the good son on her terms; which is to say; I sit in silence and tell them about my day and listen to shitty advice and lecturing and when they need me for help, I help and when they need me for something else, I do that too and all the while she controls everything.
 
FUck that noise, nigger. Fuck that shit.
 
I am an adult. If they want to be a retarded pointless family, they can be one. All fun has to be 'safe', all conversations have to be 'safe', if I want to buy a gift it has to be the thing the child most desires, if I want to teach the child a life lesson it has to be 'safe' and 'voluntary'. Atheism doesn't exist and homosexuality is okay if it stays outside of the house.
 
Alright, good, good, good. Live your lives and die like livestock, I will sit on my own loneliness until it's too much to bear and then I will kms.
 
I fucking hate this life, everything is mediocre and pointless and everyone is fucking stupid. I think I won't be older than thirty, I will kill myself before I become thirty years old. I will overdose on heroin or sleeping pills or something else painless.
GermanyBernd2021-03-10 07:03:07 · 5yNo. 111724sagereply
You're not an adult. You should seek therapy or kys. But you should certainly shut up. Nobody wants or needs to hear your shitty opinions.
NetherlandsBernd2021-03-24 14:45:07 · 5yNo. 112614sagereply
je hoeft geen witregels tussen elke zin te zetten

NetherlandsBernd2021-03-06 22:01:26 · 5yNo. 111538reply
POV: You told me you started to play chess because you saw The Goyim's Gambit.
1 message omitted.
NetherlandsBernd2021-03-06 23:20:09 · 5yNo. 111545reply
Talent stirs from righteous motivation.
GermanyBernd2021-03-08 22:21:44 · 5yNo. 111652reply
POV: You are a stupid antisemite and we need to remove you from the gene pool.
NetherlandsBernd2021-03-08 22:51:20 · 5yNo. 111666reply
GermanyBernd2021-03-09 17:01:23 · 5yNo. 111693reply
there are 2 kinds of antisemites: those who are very stupid and those who are very smart

NetherlandsBernd2021-03-06 23:21:31 · 5yNo. 111546reply
Berndie, are you planning to start a family? Would you marry a woman that you can't be yourself with or would you rather live your life in solemn retreat?
9 messages omitted.
NetherlandsBernd2021-03-07 02:21:59 · 5yNo. 111565reply
If you get to that point and you meet a woman who is demanding of you in less than positive ways, 'be keinbernd, provide for me', but she isn't terrible, would you then accept her or wait for a woman who's your soulmate who might never come?
GermanyBernd2021-03-07 02:28:09 · 5yNo. 111566reply
No, wtf?! Of course not.
NetherlandsBernd2021-03-07 02:29:21 · 5yNo. 111567reply
So where lies the cut-off for Mrs. Right? Do you wait until you fall head over heels at the first second or do you want a nymph-Freya?
GermanyBernd2021-03-07 16:24:11 · 5yNo. 111582reply
This is an autistic way of thinking, in my onion. I either want to be with a woman or don't. There is no 73% woman that I will keep because I don't think there will be a 82% woman anytime soon.

BerndDEAD BOARDBernd2021-03-07 06:01:35 · 5yNo. 111569reply
DEAD BOARD
3 messages omitted.
GermanyBernd2021-03-07 13:23:30 · 5yNo. 111576reply
well, i'm here all day
FinlandBernd2021-03-07 14:28:39 · 5yNo. 111577reply
good
bost something then
GermanyBernd2021-03-07 14:40:15 · 5yNo. 111578reply
I won't spam this board alone, that's not what we need
GermanyBernd2021-03-07 14:52:52 · 5yNo. 111579reply
We need serious discussions.

GermanyBernd2021-03-06 18:24:55 · 5yNo. 111505reply
test
 
pic related
TurkeyBernd2021-03-06 19:02:13 · 5yNo. 111511reply
Why are jews scared of christians dying? Fear of muslim attack?
GermanyBernd2021-03-06 23:00:04 · 5yNo. 111542reply
jews and muslims are both of the oriental race, they get along
NetherlandsBernd2021-03-07 00:08:30 · 5yNo. 111552reply

TexasBernd2021-02-03 03:16:32 · 5yNo. 108667reply
I am a 30 something year old virgin
4 messages omitted.
AustriaBernd2021-02-14 11:31:00 · 5yNo. 109646reply
Go get yourself a nice, clean, good quality whore. Do not forget a prostitute is at least *honest* about what she is, and what she is good for. Choose them with care. Treat her well if she is treating you well, be honest and friendly (but don't go White Knight/SIMP ('I'mma in love nows!', 'she Pretty Woman I'mma her Loverboy!', 'I rescue her!' and bs); she is no damsel in distress).
Get laid and done. Preferably a few times, with diff ladies. Try experiment to find out what you like, what not. Later, if you got some experience, find a grill and guide her into your rapedun- err, your castle, as the princess that she is. Make babies nonstop, teach her to be good waifu, to clean up after her, to make sammiches mucho. And tacos. Godspeed, texan boi.
FinlandBernd2021-02-14 23:21:05 · 5yNo. 109696reply
So am I.
United StatesBernd2021-02-26 20:18:45 · 5yNo. 110927reply
Based image.
NetherlandsBernd2021-03-06 22:03:17 · 5yNo. 111539reply
Sex is unfulfilling, visit a prostitute to lose your obsession with it.

NetherlandsBernd2021-03-03 17:09:19 · 5yNo. 111287reply
This post will incite seething.
GermanyBernd2021-03-03 23:34:39 · 5yNo. 111308reply
>seething
pls dont use that word and such word derivatives

NetherlandsBernd2021-02-28 21:51:00 · 5yNo. 111062reply
Today on my way to the KFC for a Double Crunch Fire Burger I saw this bald, white man who looked broadly Eastern European walk with a bottle of alcohol in his hand. I thought he might hit me but he didn't.
On my way back I noticed ruckus down the street, and when I came there there seemed to have been battery assault against a hobo. I tried running after the assailant after it seemed nobody had recorded the vehicle registration plate, but unfortunately that was impossible.
I called the police and after waiting for them, they still didn't show up. Two more hobos speaking a variation of German and other languages and dialects showed up, one a short Indian looking guy and the other a Portuguese guy with blue eyes and a bike and a cut on his forehead.
 
We went to the police station and I had to ward off stares. Eventually the cop took my information and video footage and let me go, there was this other guy with a headwound and blood coming out, working in the harbour who came in who talked about his older daughter wanting to be in the airforce and his younger daughter as a nurse. He was pretty funny, and the other policeman who looked sharp like a cream of the crop Waffen-SS shock trooper laughed with him.
 
That's about it, a pretty eventful day.
Maybe I should become a policeman after studying Informatica/Computer Science.
8 messages omitted.
NetherlandsBernd2021-02-28 23:48:24 · 5yNo. 111085reply
Also: How fun is compsci? What are the things you can do now and do now that you couldn't or didn't know you could before?
BerndBernd2021-02-28 23:59:37 · 5yNo. 111089reply
>How hard is mathematics in practice once you get over the hurdle of passing exams?
How hard? We barely do maths anymore, it really was only a tool to get rid of about 60% of the students. Disgusting.
 
Unless you're a genius, the only thing you can really do with maths is doing exercises over and over so you learn the patterns to pass the exams.
 
>How fun is compsci?
Sometimes it is interesting, most of the time however it's don't. A lot of the stuff you learn will not even be useful for your future job. The random coding projects I do since I was maybe 12 years old helped me 10 times more in my side job than my education.
If you ask me what I can do now what I could not do before, it is getting a job in one year when I have my papers.
 
The people also tend to be introverted Nerds that are simply not a lot of fun to hang out with. And those who aren't nerds mostly picked up IT because they heard about the "great chances" you will have as a computer engineer. They all suck dick and get frustrated about the easiest coding projects.
NetherlandsBernd2021-03-01 00:09:14 · 5yNo. 111090reply
>How hard? We barely do maths anymore, it really was only a tool to get rid of about 60% of the students. Disgusting.
Damn... how early did they start filtering?
>Unless you're a genius, the only thing you can really do with maths is doing exercises over and over so you learn the patterns to pass the exams.
DAMNIT
I have not graduated high school with mathematics. NL can be weird like that. There are courses I can take to catch up but this means I will have a very stressful year ahead of me if I study computer science.
>The people also tend to be introverted Nerds that are simply not a lot of fun to hang out with. And those who aren't nerds mostly picked up IT because they heard about the "great chances" you will have as a computer engineer. They all suck dick and get frustrated about the easiest coding projects.
Why aren't nerds interesting? Personally my uncle is a great guy and compsci professor and this manga cafe I go to has a lot of compsci autists. They're great company.
 
All in all I am scared but seeing as I am tired of being a layman retard who can't into technical jobs because he's cucked out of of maths I think I will take on the goliath of my mathematicsphobia and lack of knowledge.
 
Do you think at age 19 one can be successful at getting an adequate understanding of mathematics at realschule exam level if he wants to get into CompSci in September and is willing to put down money? Or should I look at something else in your opinion?
GermanyBernd2021-03-01 00:24:05 · 5yNo. 111091reply
>Damn... how early did they start filtering?
First year, obviously. And they stopped after the first year.
 
>Why aren't nerds interesting?
It is not that nerds are not interesting, I'm also from a "nerd family".
What I meant is that at least for me, these people that can't do anything else but talking about their video games or what so ever are boring.
In my free time I also want to make music and take psychedelics, not only discuss the new path of exiles patch notes.
 
>Do you think at age 19 one can be successful at getting an adequate understanding of mathematics
I was also 19 when I started in Uni.
If you are the NL guy who already read Mishima's Sailor, then I am pretty sure that you're a lot smarter than me, so don't worry.

NetherlandsBernd2021-02-23 21:17:04 · 5yNo. 110712reply
You may think that reading books may strengthen one's humanity and feelings of belonging, and to a certain extent this is true.
 
I just finished watching the movie Spree and aside from a few problems I could recognise myself in the main character.
 
Let's charter or maybe diagnose the illness of Hollywood tackling of social issues which aren't apparent to 'successful' people.
 
Intelligent men who struggle with finding objectivity in the world can be devoured by nihilism and become little automatons of chaos whirring from place to place looking to depower.
 
Personally, I want to depower by becoming a civil servant. I think that's the closest path to bringing this ride to a good end. To have a little bit of money and to be able to raise a family.
 
However, what people are not understanding is that these sentiments of mine are mostly because of the degree of structure of the Dutch constitutional monarchy.
 
Since the 90s, feminisation has been regent. The smoothing over of sharp objectives that could give rise to absurdities like Nazism, Leftism and Islamism when taken to their logical conclusion and the installation of boundaries that people can't cross without kicking up a lot of dirt.
 
Yet this body of manhood kept stirring like a dead corpse pierced with jump cables. Countless incidents followed and countless of empathic films were made in response, often made by people who had 'made it'. People who have 'made it' cannot and will not understand that which people who have not 'made it' posit because it forms an existential threat.
 
People who recognise the boundaries for what they're worth are more likely to end up not making it, or killing themselves. As such a lot of influential authors whose literature is being read all around end up killing themselves. Japanese authors who sense the collapse of their homogeneity and the pristine distinction between oriental and occidental, American authors who are overwhelmed by the totalitarianism of neoliberalism.
 
Short anecdote in-between: Last year, I read The Sailor Who Fell From Grace With the Sea by Yukio Mishima. It is a very masculine book, the woman is in some ways scrutinised and the son is seen as an anti-hero with the sailor as the fateful Hercules who dies as a result of circumstance and not of one great challenge.
 
The female teacher hailing from Hungary didn't like the book after teaching it to the class. We would read The Great Gatsby and Alice Munro's short stories and they were praised incredibly despite regarding issues irrelevant to the male body or to the present times, but when people read TSWFFGWTS it was to be pulled from curriculum the year after.
That is because no matter what one's intelligence is, they cannot understand that which isn't corporeally theirs. Fascism is male. Feminism is female.
 
My initial feelings of contempt that a high school class was reading the same book I was have largely faded. Not entirely, ofcourse.
 
However I have come to an understanding: everyone will interpret from a work of literature, anything they wish. Language is very difficult for a lot of people and rather than a single, objective thing connecting people of 55 IQs to people of 180 IQs it is more like a lake where one person will swim across it with ease while another will sink to the depths and become tangled in the weeds.
 
At first glance, analysing the biological fascism that is inherent to men isn't difficult. I will go to an open day of an inner-city art school with my friend and the graphic design department will have, among various 'pepe' or terrorist attack Mandela Effect exhibitions one exhibition regarding school shooters and their backgrounds. I ofcourse knew all about it, surprising the art hoe who presented the project. I swear her voice hid contempt.
 
The reality is that language only means something when it is embodied. Someone who has read Nietzsche and someone who has watched a YouTube video on Nietzsche can say the exact same thing, word for word and the person who has read him will have said it better.
 
As such all of these observable things; Pepe, MDE, Mike Ma, Yotsuba culture, school shooters, ISIL, Breitbart can always be explained in excellent ways, however the spirit lacks and there always seems to be missing a set piece, something that will really hammer it in.
 
Something like this could be the suicide of the author, or their alcoholism or some other object which shows that there is a boundary crossed which allows the author to not just peek, but embody this feeling for acceleration, for pushing the sharp edges over the seminal membrane and introducing a new reaction, a new revolution.
 
However Fight Club's author is gay and Spree's director is a bald male feminist.
 
What I am trying to say is that there is a universal identity crisis among intelligent men and that this goes beyond scientific observation. I believe that in the years to come there will be social seismic activity the likes of which we've seen before in 2011, in 1977 and in 1942.
 
Consider this post a confession; literature betrays the status quo, if autistic men do not depower they will blow a fuse, Hollywood doesn't get it, sociologists do not get it, politicians are living in fairyland and I am a hedgehog suffocating in a pink condom.
 
TL;DR : We're DOOMED
GermanyBernd2021-02-24 10:04:59 · 5yNo. 110726reply
>Personally, I want to depower by becoming a civil servant. I think that's the closest path to bringing this ride to a good end. To have a little bit of money and to be able to raise a family.
 
Sames, however I am not sure if this will make me happy.
I am very scared to commit to the cozy countryside life of a civil servant with a wife and two kids because I might just die of boredom.
 
I want to have done something meaningful in my life, something that people can remember me for even after I died, something like writing music or a book that more than just fifty people will listen to, read and remember.
It is sad that less and less young people play musical instruments here, I hope that once I am old there will still be an orchestra close to me that I can be a part of.
 
Also
>Mishima Yukio
based
 
I read The Temple of the Golden Pavilion by him when I was 19 simply because he was famous but I can proudly admit that I feel like I did not even understand half of what he was trying to say.
Together with Kafka on the shore and some others, it is one of the books I plan to reread in a few years when I am hopefully a little wiser.
NetherlandsBernd2021-02-25 01:10:53 · 5yNo. 110791reply
The recommended start to Mishima is Sailor. What did you think of Temple? I've been meaning to read it for a while.
 
As for legacy to this world, I will leave children if I have them. I want a conventional lifestyle, most great people had civil servants and other unimportant people parenting them.
 
I am reading Plato's Republic now and in the discussion with Keifalos it's mentioned how rich people are 'good' because they do not have debts to anyone.
 
I have debts to society that I must repay but once I have material comfort my children will only have a moral debt to the world, one that everyone carries.
 
Sometimes it sounds like someone's walking in my house or I'll hear a woman's voice in the shower and it freaks me the fuck out.
GermanyBernd2021-02-27 15:41:06 · 5yNo. 110970reply
>What I am trying to say is that there is a universal identity crisis among intelligent men
Ah, so that's what you were trying to say. I dare say that the man's tower looks far more stable and efficient than the women's tower. Many of the men who built it are now disposable of course and that is a problem none of the women have. Some of them might decide to write a book and hang themselves.

NetherlandsBernd2021-02-26 15:40:18 · 5yNo. 110913reply
Counter transference with my psychiatrist.
GermanyBernd2021-02-26 15:45:14 · 5yNo. 110914reply
Elaborate. Do they like/dislike you? What feelings do you think they have for you?
GermanyBernd2021-02-26 15:47:05 · 5yNo. 110915reply
>my psychiatrist
i knew it
NetherlandsBernd2021-02-26 16:33:11 · 5yNo. 110917reply
I'm just memeing. Taught her chess rules today and she laughs with me.

NetherlandsBernd2021-02-25 15:56:25 · 5yNo. 110813reply
Doing a poo.
GermanyBernd2021-02-25 16:03:22 · 5yNo. 110814reply
BerndBernd2021-02-25 16:38:48 · 5yNo. 110816reply
casual?
NetherlandsBernd2021-02-25 21:15:13 · 5yNo. 110835reply
Why do you complicate shits?

NetherlandsBernd2021-02-25 01:06:35 · 5yNo. 110790reply
You're at the Gamestop when this guy oxidizes your gf's adrenaline. What do??

UkraineBernd2021-02-19 22:24:02 · 5yNo. 110300reply
someone should conduct an experiment,
each dream dreamed by human test subject, should be documented and put into some database or wherever it can be easily found later
 
then each time a test subject having a deja vu feeling, researchers quickly search any matches in dreams database to find out if the feel of recurrence given by event the test subject is experiencing right now justified (was dream of before) or not (false sense)
 
thus deciding if the suspicions of some humans about the world surrounding us is a simulation are justified or not
3 messages omitted.
UkraineBernd2021-02-20 09:47:08 · 5yNo. 110307reply
>I dont understand how justification of deja vu ties into the simulation theory
 
it's don't actually,
but if humans can predict some tiny bits of their future in their dreams, there might be some explanation
 
and the explanation might also hint towards simulation theory or might not, i just like the idea of the world being a simulation
 
 
>I personally believe I have dreams that "predict" future events.
>I put predict into brackets because they don't have practical value
 
are those just brief "images" that doesn't give any context to them, and may appear randomly within a dream completely untied from a dream's plot?
 
like you see yourself doing something for a second or two,
and then, months will pass, and all of a sudden you do something and find what you see before you oddly familiar
 
???
SwedenBernd2021-02-20 09:54:52 · 5yNo. 110308reply
this was on HN frontpage right before this thread. coincidence?
https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=26194534
UkraineBernd2021-02-20 10:43:25 · 5yNo. 110311reply
GermanyBernd2021-02-23 18:52:05 · 5yNo. 110699reply
Nah, it's not brief images in an unrelated dream. The whole dream is a certain situation. And when I realize months later that I had dreamt what is happening before, it's not just feeling kinda similar. It is the same situation with multiple identifyable factors. For example:
 
One summer break between switching schools I was dreaming about being in a classroom. I had never seen this classroom before. The tables were arranged a certain way, I was sitting in a certain place, I could see outside the window that is was next to a hillside and I remember sitting a hot blonde girl sitting in front of me. At the time I thought it was strange to dream about being in a classroom I had never seen instead of the classrooms I was used to. Months later, I realized I was in the exact same situation as in the dream.
 
Other times the dreams might have a piece of conversation in them. I dream someone saying certain things to me and then me responding. When I later on realize I had dreamt this situation, one time I consciously decided replying with something else and thereby changed the course of the conversation that I had experienced in a dream. It was now different.
 
You see, when I hear deja vus described it seems really simple to me. "Oh I saw this guy and he looked kinda familiar." or something like that. But with my dreams I sometimes notice "well that was an odd dream", but I obviously don't know it will be predictive. I forget about it for a while and then the situation happens and I immediately remember all the details that are the same.

NetherlandsBernd2021-02-22 21:10:52 · 5yNo. 110634reply
Posted on 4channel's /int/'s Dutch general nederdraad that I was going to shoot up the Dam [big plaza with a big WWII memorial in the capital] and the parliament [in a different city]. It was jokingly but then I got banned for violating US or local law.
 
I called the police a few moments after and after she got all of my identifying information she said she'd make a note that I have no intention of shooting up the Dam or the parliament and that I was stupid.
 
I am shitting myself, all articles I've read about dumb teens doing this mention some sort of punishment. I was just getting on the right track and I might get my asshole gaped by the machinations of the State.
 
FUCK
 
BONUS ANECDOTE:
Went to masturbate at the fertility clinic in Zwolle today. I really liked the city and I am thinking of moving there if I DON'T GET FUCKING JAILTIME.
Really uncomfortable that the exit led me past all of the couples in waiting areas.
 
On the train back this ethnic Dutch girl kept trying to get me to notice her, and subsequently I did the same. I'd look at this little brown child because half he was cute and half I wanted to seem fatherly to her. I was reading some of Kobo Abe's The Box Man [almost finished] and she grabbed a book aswell but almost immediately put her phone in between the book and herself. Made me think she tried to grab my attention.
 
After I while I tried to think of ways to court her but I didn't have a pen so I wanted to leave my passport there as if I forgot it, and then head out in a way that she focusses on me and not my seat, but a based black man told me I forgot my passport and I got cock blocked. She gave me bed eyes when I walked out.
 
That's it for my day. Maybe tomorrow my life will fall apart, maybe not.
How was your day, Bernd?
4 messages omitted.
GermanyBernd2021-02-23 13:53:21 · 5yNo. 110673reply
NetherlandsBernd2021-02-23 17:41:22 · 5yNo. 110688reply
Police hasn't contacted me since.
GermanyBernd2021-02-23 18:39:28 · 5yNo. 110693reply
4chan probably doesn't care about working with Dutch police. Why would they?
NetherlandsBernd2021-02-23 18:44:37 · 5yNo. 110696reply
There's been multiple crimes announced on 4chan and 8chan, I think it's fair to assume that in order to be protected by Cloudflare a company needs to abide by national laws to some extent; no terrorism, no CP, no nonsense.
Which is to say, if an attack did happen, 4chan might be banned from the Netherlands, losing revenue and receiving law suits.
There's been jokey threats from 4chan about attacks on Dutch soil before and their identities were leaked to the police. I tried to preempt that. If there is no evidence and 4chan doesn't forward any information, then I am probably safe since the police won't investigate a non-existent threat. If they did forward it, I might get a slap on the wrist or if they don't like my face a few weeks in jail.
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