>Mayo with beet soup
Every time I'm in a grocery store I grab one of the pre made sandwiches and walk up to the deli counter to ask for Mayo packets while holding the sandwich. They usually hand me 2 or 3. Then I put the sandwich back acting like I decided against buying it and continue shopping.
With this method I accumulate enough mayonnaise over time that I rarely ever need to buy it.
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> Be me.
> Born to Jewish father and non-Jewish mother.
> Believe in God, pray, never cut my hair, eat Kosher, et cetera.
> Both of my parents are secular, so can't attend synagogue, (It starts early and I don't have a driver's license.) am not circumsized, and have never formally read the Torah.
> Have mean ahh classmate.
> Jewish by all means (is female, so not circumcision), attends synagogue, Jewish mother.
> Says I'm not Jewish. (Because of Talmud.)
> But a bunch of kids in that spread rumors about me, including my classmate.
> We often sit next to each other (our teacher chooses) and the city where I live borders the city where my classmate lives.
> Does that make us neighbors?
> If so, would my classmate bearing false witness against me break the 10 Commandments?
> Who Outjews who here?
For everyone about to comment that Outjewwing isn't real, this is a joke. But this really happened.
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I watch all these rave and techno videos (example: YouTube: rKPBq_j4buQ), but I know I will never be able to actually go to one of those because I'm not hot, don't have friends who are into that and too shy.
